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[Wednesday
January 21st, 2009
9:12pm] |
Well, its been a really long time since I updated my live journal. The last time I wrote, i was all hung up about a boy that really means nothing to me now. I was young and stupid. Time is honestly the best medicine.
Things have changed so much. Im in college now and I love it. Im dating james now. I love him. we;ve been together for about 10 months now. Overall Im just really happy.
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| havent wrotee in a whilee |
[Saturday
September 30th, 2006
11:19am] |
welll
this past month was probably the worst byfar..
me and liam broke up 2 days after our one year. It was actually a huge shock. I regret not appreciating him being around but i have to get into the habbit of not thinking about him or calling him or talking to him.. it really really sucks. I miss him alot. for the first few nights i dont really think i slept. and when i did sleep i'd wake up and realize what happened. He said he hasnt felt the same about me since june and that really sucks cause my whole summer i saw him as much as i possibly could between me working and him working. I think what hurts the most is that im so unwanted by him. it kills to think that a year ago everything was just starting and who would have know it would end so badly.
and another thing that happened is i finally got my puppy oliver but hes really sick with pnuemonia and he has worms. the guy that sold him to us lied about basically everything and the place we bought olvier from all the dogs were sick. so i basically lost 2 boys this month .
awesome
but still at the same time things are looking up. i get to hang out with friends that i havent hung out with in a while. i can do somethings without worrying about what liam would feel or say. its just weird that the last time i saw liam everything was fine it was our one year. its weird how things can change so much and how much i changed over the last week or so..
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[Friday
May 19th, 2006
12:03pm] |
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agh,so today is the boringestt,
its lunch time now and im soo tiredd
but im not hungry && its gay im never hungry at lunch time. the gross greasy foods just turn me offfff from anyfood.
just the smell of the cafeteria makes me grossed out. but whatever
nothings really that exciting right now.. i came to school late to sleep in and then im leaving at 1:15 today to go and get my hair done for prom =)
im going with liam, obviously
marilyns not going cause alex is gay...
and thats that.
this week has been okay.
lately i've been really woried about me and liams relationship but everythings good now. i always get nervous something bad is going to happen with use but its not likely it will..
i'd be really upset if anything ever happens to us.
but yea on a better note im happily addicted to sucking my thumb.. i need to stop!
hellp!!
so yes thats it for the day.. i'll post pictures for the prom cause my dress owns everybody in the place.=)
peaceee love
samsson!
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[Wednesday
March 15th, 2006
6:11pm] |
hello
third day updating, you should be proud, cause i know i am
today was lamo lamo
you know
but anyway.
i just wanted to update just to keep it steady =o)
must go play some drums in the clubbbb mon.
oh ps i missed marilyn today
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[Tuesday
March 14th, 2006
4:12pm] |
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mood |
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 bouncy |
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i miss old friends.
i hate fighting.
i love warm weather
anywhom. today was like anyother day
i got up, late, got ready.
dragged my self around the house picked up marilyn & went to school.
The other night me and Liam were talking about the summer and how everything seemed so new,like when we met, we were interested in eachother and we were open to it until like a little more then a month later. We were talking about how in the begginging of our relationship we were both scared i guess that we wouldnt like eachother if we acted a certain way, so we were i guess shy around eachother and then comparing how we used to be to now see so much different.I feel like we take advantage of eachother now and we get mad at eachother over stupid things that arent even worth getting mad at. Then here comes my bitching mood, when i cry about everything: I dont know i guess i was just thinking to hard and i felt like i was the reason for liams bad moods, i felt like im his girlfriend and i really shouldnt be causing my own byfreind stress and anger, i felt like he was just "putting up with me". I dont knnow everythings settled now and yea.
other than that i didnt do much thinking today =)
but yea so im gonna go eat.
peace love
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[Monday
March 13th, 2006
6:21pm] |
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mood |
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 groggy |
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i know, so im constantly saying im going to update more often, but i always forget, oops.
so yea now theres nothing really to say.
i went to the gym with marilyn today:goodtimes
did a shit load of english homework.
and thats probably about it for now.
im upset.
my ipods completly ruined
&
my camerea screen isnt working
i break everything.
eww
todays only monday.
must go.
i'll try and update laterr..?
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[Saturday
October 15th, 2005
10:31pm] |
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THIS MONTH FUCKING SUCKSS>
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[Tuesday
October 4th, 2005
10:20am] |
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mood |
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 geeky |
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music |
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oh marilyn |
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heellloo =)
im thinking about restarting livejournal.im not sure why, i just feel like its needed.
i really have nothing to say. so i figured i'd just leave pictures.kaycool
( follow the yellow brick road )
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[Sunday
July 17th, 2005
8:15pm] |
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mood |
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cant complain |
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music |
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straight jacket feeling -aar |
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wow... i havent used this thing in like forever and a half..
besides that. i think one of these days im gonna have a long entry. infact maybe i will now..
So yes, i havent updated in a while. i dont know why.i just dont have the time and myspace deffintly took overrr i like it better then lj but whatever.. alot has changed.. my last entry on lj was about how me and damon became friends and shit.. well in a atter of a month , damon and stephen & i sorta just went our own ways. which i respect now becuase things are better between us., although i feel like i bother stephen when i rarely call him.. i dont know whyy. But yea so i guess thinkgs are alright now.. m.e.m.s. is kinda idk anymore.. we went through alot and then like it seems like we grew apart. no names involved but idk hopefully that gets fixed quikly.
Camp started about 3 weeks ago. its fun alls good there. i still have feelings for the same person. who couldnt see that coming though. its retarded but. whatever what are you gonna do about it. i cant help how i feel about that person and some people just dont understand that.. whatever. so yea basically i do nothing all day i sit at game tents with marilyn joe jon and joe. its fun. -- usually 4th period we skip and go to the cafeteria and we meet laur and lexa there.. those grls are alot of fun -- one of the main reasons i enjoy camp is them-- so yea. its arite.
betweent he last entry and now i met alot of cool people including leaving the will. which is really cool and i became close with themm and also even though marilyn and alex broke up- marily and i still make time for steve mike and c.j cause we lovee them..
so yea that basically covers it for now... maybe i'll update agian.. i doubt it.
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[Friday
April 22nd, 2005
4:19am] |
wow.. its 4:19 in the morning...
me and dame decided on pulling an all nighter so were staying awake till the sunrise.. that reminds me of lake george.. idk im not really tired more like drousyy.. thats it.. its cool though i want to say i was able to accomplish thiss.
..marilyns sleeping.. whats new.. nothing..
um today me and marilyn went to the city bought sunglasses and stuff.. good stuff..
on the ride home.. me and marilyn, our dream came true,we were lucky enough and ended up sitting next to an abercrombie model.. o my god.. he was gawwgus. really though.. i go pictures cause i know all the guys reading this are dieng to see this hott peice of ass.. =P..
well back to what im dooing.. staying up all night.. just for a semce of accomplishment i guess.. im gonna bounce love youu<33late
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[Wednesday
April 20th, 2005
10:33pm] |
hayyy..
gosh today was funn.. i hung out with marilyn for a while then mike steve and alex came over and i made pasta but no one was hungery so they didnt eatt it. but yeaa we were really hot the whole time so then me mike and steve decided to jump into the pool.. it was freeezzing but yea its all good. byeeee ♥♥♥♥
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[Wednesday
April 20th, 2005
11:35am] |
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mood |
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 awake |
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music |
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summer breeze covered by jason mraz |
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First, Last, future and current
.Firsts.
First best friends: ellen
First car: dont have one
First date: idkkk?
First real, actual, PROPER kiss: summer going into 8th grade
First self purchased cd: mychemical romance
First pets: an electric fishh
First piercing/tattoo: ears
.Lasts.
Last cigarette: neverr
Last car ride: last night
Last kiss: hm 2 weeks ago
Last good cry: none of them are good
Last library book checked out: hah
Last beverage drank: jello mix
Last food consumed: mallowmars.healthhyy
Last crush: Nick
Last phone call: my mom
Last shoes worn: juicy sandals
Last cd played: the car mix
Last item brought: ice cream cake
Last annoyance: my mom
Last disappointment: hm seeing jesse smoking
Last website visited: livejournal
Last song you sang: the remedy-jason mraz i love him
.Future.
Where do you want to go in life: be happy
What is your career going be? idkk?
Where are you going to live: here i guess
How many kids do you want: twins one boy and one girl so the boy has hot freinds for the girl.
What kind of car do you want: jeep cherokee
.Current.
Current mood: hm blah/whatever
Current music: the remedy
Current taste: jello
Current hair: striaght
Current clothes: skrt belt and juicy shirt =)
Current desktop: tyson ritter duh.
Now...(x) if you've done___and___ (0) if you haven't done
(x)been drunk
(x)been high
(x)kissed a member of the opposite sex
(x)kissed a member of the same sex
(0)crashed a friends car
(0)been to japan
(x)ridden in a taxi
(x)been dumped
(0)been in a fist fight
(x)snuck out of marilyns house
(0)ever had a crush on someone of the same sex
(0)dated someone of the same sex
(x)had feelings for someone who didn't have them back
(0)been arrested
(0)made out with a stranger
(0)Stole something from a job
(x)celebrated new year in times square-when i was like 7
(0)gone on a blind date
(x)had a crush on a teacher-mr.murphy my one and onlyy=P
(0)celebrated mardi gras in new orleans
(0)been to europe
(0)skipped school
(0)cut myself on purpose
(0)been married
(0)been divorced
(0)had children
(0)seen someone die
(0)been to africa
(0)punched a friend -
(0)been to canada
(0)been to mexico
(x)been on a plane
(0)seen the rocky horror picture show
(0)thrown up in a bar
(x)purposely set a body part on fire
(x)eaten sushi
(0)been snowboarding
(0)met someone in person from the internet
(O)been moshing in a concert
(0)had true feelings for someone you only knew online
(x/0)been in an abusive relationship
(0)been pregnant
(0)lost a child
(0)been to college
(0)graduated college
(0)tried killing yourself
(x)taken painkillers
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[Saturday
April 16th, 2005
4:54pm] |
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heyy.. i havente updated in a really long time.. nothing is really neww. but one thing is for sure.. it sucks to be ignored. whatever what are u gonna do. but im gonna post some picture.=)
me and marilynnnn <33 i love her
agian againn haaa
choruss people :marilyn lisa me t-bop errica and michelle.
chorus.. yes we get bored. brill and i being sickk and chriss
ericaaa shes so cute.
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[Friday
April 8th, 2005
10:40pm] |
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is anyONe getting huRt?
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[Wednesday
April 6th, 2005
4:21pm] |
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mood |
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 anxious |
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music |
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lover i dont have to love //bright eyes |
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The picture is far too big to look at kid. Your eyes won't open wide enough
and you are constantly surrounded by that swirling stream of what is and what was.
Well, we've all made our predictions but the truth still isn't out.
So if you want to see the future, go stare into a cloud.
And keep trying to find your way out of that maze of memories.
It all sort of looks familiar, but then you get up close and it's different. clearly. Each time you turn a corner, you are right back to where you were
and your only hope is that forgetting might make a door appear.
Is it your fear of being buried that makes you so afraid to speak?
An avalanche of opinions like the one that feel that I am now underneath.
It was my voice that moved the first rock and I would do it all again.
So, I mean, it's cool if you keep quiet, but I like singing.
So I'll be holding my note and stomping and strumming and feeling so very lucky.
There is nothing I know except that this lifetime is just one moment
and wishing will just leave me empty. So you can try and live in darkness
but you will never shake the light. It will greet you every morning
and make you more aware with its absence at night,
when you are wrapped up in your blanket baby, that comfortable cocoon.
But I have seen the day of your awakening boy and it's coming soon.
So go ahead and loose yourself in liquor and you can praise the clouded mind
but it isn't what you are thinking it's the course of history, your position in line. You are just a piece of the puzzle so I think you had better find your place.
And don't go blaming your knowledge on some fruit you ate.
Because there has been a great deal of discussion, yes, about the properties of man. Animal or angel? You were carved from bone, but your heart it's just sand.
And the wind is going to scatter it and cover everything with love.
So if it makes you happy, keep kneeling Mama, but I am standing up.
Because this veil, it has been lifted. My eyes are wet with clarity.
I have been a witness of such wonders. Oh, I have searched for them all across this country but I think I'll be returning now to the town where I was born.
And I understand you must keep moving friend, but I am heading home.
I'm gonna follow the road and let the scenery sweeping by easily enter my body.
I'll send you all this message in code, under ground, over mountains,
through forests, deserts and cities. All across the electric wire, it's a baited line. The hook is in deep boys,there is no more time. So you can struggle in the water and be too stubborn to die,or you could just let go and be lifted to the sky.
awesome song the big picture
hm im tired.. and i have to go to yoga and boxing with erin and carolyn soon unless i pass out of course. i'll update laterr<33 i love you
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| soo tired |
[Sunday
April 3rd, 2005
3:09am] |
heyy i just got back from nicks housee & im soo tired..
today was arite..nothing special..i sat home most of the day doing nothing then i went to one of alex's shows with marilyn -and i saw miss caity walsh..shes reallyyy funny hah i love her
but anyways then we went to alex's house for a bitt.it was fun// me and mike had this game with jellybeans and i deffinitly won but yea i let him win too cause im jusst a nice person..
then me and marilyn got back and at like 12:30 i decided to walk to nicks house..and marilyn was asleep and i didnt really want to wake her so i went alone in the pitch black (with some exceptions of houses) and raining out.. yeaaaa not fun but whatever.
so yeaa i justttt got back and im really not looking fowatd to tommarow =/ i have to wake up really early for some stupid lions breakfast thing since marilyn and i are proud members of the leos. rightttt.
catch ya later sunshine.
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[Tuesday
March 29th, 2005
2:24pm] |
heyy im in burkes room.. me krissy and hillary decided to stay afterrr.
im supposed to be in math right now for extra help but i really dont want to go.. i have this health essay do tommaroww. i dont want to do it.. maybe i'll start it.. well im gonna go hang out with them =) byee loveys
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[Saturday
March 26th, 2005
6:45am] |
| [ |
mood |
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 sleepyy |
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music |
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awake.dc |
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heyy.im soo tiredd =(
yesterday i got a haircutt with marilyn in conneticut and then we went to go get food =) & coffee.. good stufff.
then i went home for a little then realized i have nothing to wear for easter .. so i made my mom bring me shopping.. brought stuff.. yeaa.
at night i went to nicks house it wass funn
todayy my family and marilyns family are going upstate to mohunk mountain some shit like that for easter.. yea our familys go on vacation togethers hah. but yea i still have'nt pack i've been putting it a side for like 3 days now but i gues i have to todayy.
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[Thursday
March 24th, 2005
4:23pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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exanimate |
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music |
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amsterdam coldplay<33. |
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nothing new really.. otehr then i got my braces off but thats sorta old news...figureed i'd leave some pictures.
( picturess. )
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[Saturday
March 19th, 2005
8:11pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 aggravated |
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music |
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man on the side. jm |
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hm im grounded ..=(
well sort of.. i dont know.. my moms a bitch and over reacts to everythinggg.
last night i went to battle of the bands .. saw alot of people. then after i went to marilyns with ellen. they watched the care bear movie hah and iwas onthe phone with stephen for like 3 hours.. yea.
today me and marilyn had to work at the easter egg hunt cause we're leos. fun?. "we just worked really hard", "what the fuck are steaks and why are we putting meat in the ground.".. hah yea were just not put out for work like that..
then after my mom made me go to my sisters basketball game.. sat in the car and cried on the phone with marilyn cause my mom was being a bitch to me. and then i went home and did homework and im grounded and im babysitting my sister now.. =(
my moms a meanie and she said.. MAYBE i can go to marilyns tonight.. i hope i can.. sometimes when i stay in my house for to long i get like. cabin fever. ha idk . she better let me.
oh and *** ELLEN WELBY *** this girl is so fricken cool i love her.. she got a kitten.. and its name is.. samii like mee!. thats fucking hot. =)
well ill update later..if i update tonight that means my mom is the biggest bitch ever and wouldnt let me go to marilyns. but lets think positive peoplllllle. =)
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